Unhappy Valentine’s Day?

1308606009_ce76b95664No Valentine’s cards this year? Me neither. My husband is working away during the week at the moment and he called me on Thursday to ask if we could “do the Valentine’s Day thing” at the weekend instead. “You know,” he said. “The thing where I get you a card and a bottle of cava and you forget to get me anything?” “Oh, yeah. Sure,” I laughed.

To be honest, Valentines Day means nothing to me. It used to when I was younger and single, in that I never got any cards. Valentines Day was just an annual reinforcement of my negative self-image that would sustain me for the year to come. The truth of the matter is that I wasn’t popular at school and even when I started to have boyfriends, none of them was ever really the hearts and flowers type. Later, during my many years as a single woman in my late twenties and early thirties, I didn’t get a single card. I learned not to expect one either. I just wasn’t the type of woman that had romantic men running after her. But it didn’t mean that I wasn’t loved.

If the prospect of Valentine’s Day traditionally fills you with dread and simply exacerbates feelings of loneliness, isolation or loss then you may find this blog post from Girl on a Wire as heartwarming as I did.


I too wish to dedicate Valentines Day to all my lovely friends.


“Blue Skies, Broken Hearts” image Copyright © Brandon Weight


  1. Mary Rowen March 26, 2014 at 10:13 pm .

    I feel the same way as you about Valentine’s Day, Ruth. I also had few boyfriends when I was younger, and my one very serious one NEVER seemed to remember to give me flowers or anything. It became an exercise in frustration until, like you, I realized that love wasn’t about a guy giving you flowers or candy. My husband is much better about that stuff, but we usually don’t celebrate in a romantic way–Valentine’s Day usually means a cake after dinner for the family or maybe some chocolate. I don’t think we’ve ever gone out for a romantic Valentine’s dinner, just the two of us. I sort of wish the whole thing would go away, as it really dies seem to add much more stress to everyone than it’s worth.

    1. Ruth Mancini April 2, 2014 at 12:03 pm .

      I agree Mary. Shall we ban it? Ha ha.

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